The Abundant Life

This morning I woke up with an unusual excitement for life.  My body clock will usually wake me up just before my alarm clock does which I like because I hate the sound of my alarm clock. I wish I could find something else to wake up to, something like music or the morning news. I think that'd be good.

The feeling I had this morning surprised me though because usually when I wake up I don't tend to feel anything at all except a bit groggy.  But today I could feel the excitement of finishing up my house (I've been remodeling it over the past 14 months), the excitement of all that I want to do, the excitement from feeling like life is good and that good things are to come. By all accounts I should of felt blah and sluggish. I went to bed at about 2 in the morning (only to be awakened minutes later by a freak flash of lightening and the exploding sound of thunder that came afterword), woke up to grey skies, and had some cleaning to do.

But as I went about my day today I felt happy and excited. And it's well that I am 'cause I am really blessed. I think about all God's done for me, for His mercy, for His love, for His helping me to feel good about myself and ok with what might or might not be with regards to my future. It's crazy 'cause I'm so undeserving. I really don't deserve anything and yet, I have. I read something today that really struck me while I was thinking about the Savior. He said:

I am the living bread which came down from heaven; if any man eat of this bread, he shall live forever: and the bread that I will give is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world. - John 17:20-23 KJV

Jesus made some pretty profound and powerful statements during His ministry.  But reading this scripture confirmed to me the reason why I was feeling the way I was today. He is the giver of life and all that is good in my life.

I also read something entitled "Living the Abundant Life" by Thomas S. Monson.  I could relate a lot of what he said to my own life. In it, he talks about having a positive attitude, believing in yourself, and facing challenges with courage--all things I need to improve upon in myself.

I've made a really good friend lately. We're pretty different, but we have a lot of the same ideals and beliefs about life. He likes to talk a lot and so I listen. I usually don't have much to say because he says everything I believe in as well. And so I call him Mr. Beecher Preacher man (his last name is Beecher). I've been in need of a good friend for a long time and its great the things I can learn from him.  We do a lot together. I think the girls in our social circle are jealous. They call us lovers. But we don't mind. We have fun. We enjoy each other's company. We're there for each other.  Everyone needs someone like that in their lives and this experience has made me want to be a better person. I just need the courage--the courage to express who it is I really am.

Christmas Tree

My 2011 Christmas Tree

This year I decided to get a Christmas tree. Last year I didn't have the money which is kind of a lame excuse since I got this tree for free.

Early in December I called up a girl in my church and asked her if she wanted to go with me to the Christmas tree farm here on the island and help me pick one out. I was glad she came 'cause when we finally found the place, after driving around in circles for a while, the Christmas tree farm had plenty of signs that read "closed for season". Yep. That's island life. Thankfully her grandparents lived just across the way and own about 40 acres of woods.  She called 'em and gave them our sob story. They invited us over and together, we all went tromping through the woods in search of a tree. Strangely, it was pretty difficult to find a Christmas tree in the woods. After about an hour we found one that would work. And there it is, pictured above, shinning in all it's Christmas glory.

My grandma had given me the lights, and a coworker gave me the stand, so all in all I spent about 10 bucks on the thing since I had to buy some ornaments, which I could have also gotten for free had my dad not locked mom's ornaments in the shed behind his house. Oh well, I can't complain. It was beautiful. I loved it. It smelled great and it brought the Christmas spirit into my house and made my barren place feel a little more like a home.

Way of the Runner

My runnin' shoes.

I've ran over 200 miles in these shoes.

When my grandma first bought me 'em a couple years ago, I never imagined that they would take me down country roads, city streets, track, and majestic forest trails.

I hardly wore them for the longest time. Then, in March of this year, I embarked on a journey. Taking no thought before hand as to where I would go, or how long I would keep this up, I started running every day during my lunch break.

My coworkers thought I was crazy. Some asked if I was training for a marathon. And when I told them no they would ask, "so you just go running?" "Yes," I told 'em. "I just run."

I began to lose weight. Two pounds. Seven pounds. Ten pounds. Twenty pounds. Even thirty pounds. The pain induced by running made me feel alive. It helped me become reacquainted with a land that I had fallen out of love with.

At first, I would run only a mile. I could barely do it. I was slow. One day, after getting kicked off the high school track, I took to the streets and elsewhere. I up'd my distance to 1.4 miles. Then 2 miles. Then 2.3 miles and now 3 miles in roughly 25 minutes.

There is no other way to experience life like you do when you run. With every inhale and exhale I can sense the raw power of nature in its purest and simplest form. I run without headphones and instead, listen to the song of my surroundings.

As the seasons have changed, so has my experience. The sky went from various shades of grey, to blue, to a beautifully arraigned mix of both. Trees have gone from barren, to green, to a colorful array.  In any season, the sky is usually fascinating and the ocean views calming.

After running well over 100 miles on my own, coworkers began to join me on my daily adventures. Running with someone has made the experience that much greater.  And while we usually talk until the breathing became to heavy, there is always a language spoken in our movements.

In my short time as an urban planner, I have come to realize that sitting in a cubical 40 hours a week is not for me. A sedentary life is a life not lived.  Motion is part of what separates the living from the dead.

Among many things, running has brought me a measure of peace. It provides release to the anxious energy that my oversensitive nervous system produces. It clears my mind and erases my fatigue. It has changed my perception of life for the better.

When I think of where these shoes have taken me, it is so much further than 200 miles. It has been a spiritual journey of both pain and relief, suffering and peace. And while there may be no more life in these shoes, there is now more life in me.

Update:
In 2011 I ran a total of 289.3 miles--more than I have ever ran in my entire life combined.